At the start of this period I separated from my husband. I moved away from Sydney to the country, with a longing to heal in nature. Only a few weeks after our move we were impacted by the bushfires and evacuated from our new home. Thankfully our town was saved, due to no more than the luck of the way the wind blew. Now of course, as a collective, we are all navigating our individual journeys resulting from Covid. I have two small children and like so many parents have been feeling the pressure of trying to homeschool whilst working, maintaining our home and still processing my own collective grief.
A few years ago I qualified as a psychotherapist, which is a deeply soulful psychology and here is some of what I learned and used to hold me in this period of time.
Trauma is defined not by the outer event but by your inner emotional response to that event. As such, I have chosen not to reference myself against how I perceive everyone else’s journey at this time but to focus on holding my own. In other words if you do eight hours of home schooling and I do four, my efforts are not half as good as yours. I have the same approach to healing, the timing is my own and I try to be patient with.
I try to accept my lived experience in the moment just as it is. I have learned that if I do not allow that part of me that is needing to hurt to have its time to express, that can be harder to fight than the emotion itself.
I understand my emotions have a seasonality to them and no matter how dark today, at some point this too shall pass.
Mediation, journaling, yoga, whatever your vibe – commit to it daily. Do so not because it is trendy, or you think you should. Do so because if you want to feel joyful you must actively seek each day to understand what is really going on for you emotionally and create a space to meet it with deep compassion and non-judgement.